For the past decade, I have taken precautions to remain unknown and stay hidden from the public eye. In fact, this is the first time that I’m exposing myself to the public. My name is Kyle Milliken, I’m 30 years old and I am the epitome of a hacker and spammer.
In July of 2014, I was awoken in my Los Angeles home at 5:01 AM. What seemed to be an earthquake, was actually a flash bang grenade detonating in my guest house. I walked into my living room area to investigate the sound, only to be met by four SWAT team members aiming their M4 Carbine assault rifles at my head on the other side of my glass sliding doors leading to my pool area. There I am frozen, standing in only my briefs, sleep in my eyes, just trying to process what’s happening. Was I just a victim of a swatting prank? Would they really come after me this hard for hacking? Do I take three steps to the right and unplug my computer? Will they shoot me if I go for it? “Fuck it”. I said to myself. “COME IN, IT’S UNLOCKED”, I shouted to the SWAT team. Four more SWAT members simultaneously entered from the front door. One member of the SWAT team quickly put me in cuffs and kept asking me where the weapons were. I didn’t own any guns. I’m a computer nerd for christ-sake. They sat me on my porch and after a couple minutes, I became light headed, dizzy, and nauseous. It was the aftereffects of a serious adrenaline dump. After about fifteen minutes, the SWAT team declared my house clear. Still trying to process everything, I see five agents walking up my driveway. Only these guys didn’t look anything like the SWAT members. They were average looking, with smaller body frames, wearing FBI jackets, with no pistol on their side, they were definitely computer nerds. “Do you know why we’re here?”, one agent asked. “Well you’re not here for a fucking barbecue.”, I sarcastically replied.